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You’ve got something you want to say, a story that needs to be told and you want every ear possible to hear it. You treat life like an open book you are constantly editing. Whether it be something personal, something that needs marketing or perhaps you just enjoy listening and learning when it comes to people, you have no problem breaking down barriers and initiating someone for conversation. But are you going about it the best way possible?

For the most part, people are a lot more introvert than you. They’d rather go about their day, void of bother until they are either ready to engage or must engage. Even if you’re the most outgoing person on the planet, no one likes to feel like they’re being intruded on. However a lot of people still go about conversation in an encroaching manner hindering their possibilities for getting the most out of their discussions.

Instead of interrupting someone’s activity, try to lure them in by breaking it. If someone makes their own choice to look up from their paper or phone, you’re a lot more likely to engage that person than if you draw them in unwillingly. They feel at that point that they’ve made the decision to invest time in whatever it is you’re “selling”, because after all, what are we selling if not ourselves?

Think of it this way; you’re at the bar. You see someone across the way you find particularly attractive. No ring on their finger so they are probably single. You walk up and make a comment, “Hey, I like your beanie!” It’s an icebreaker. It certainly grabs that person’s attention, they say “thank you” and get back to their group of friends. Wouldn’t you do the same? Who is this stranger?

Now imagine that same conversation, however it started as a simple comment about the environment that you both could relate and comment on. Perhaps the air on is on a bit too strong, or the song that just came on is “your jam”. That person turns their attention your way, and they make a comment because why else would they even look if they don’t have an opinion they want to add. They either agree or disagree, and then you can continue to engage from there. That person made the choice to talk to you, they weren’t ambushed in and that’s a beautiful thing.

Stay piled, friends.

-<a title=”Top of The Bottom Pile” href=”http://www.topofthebottompile.com&#8221; target=”_blank”>Top of the Bottom Pile</a>

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